Hints for Revising Descriptive Writing

(Remember, all good writing has good descriptive language so these ideas might improve just about anything!)

Ø      If you seem short on ideas, return and add detailed ideas to your five senses web.

Ø      Use metaphors (direct comparisons) and similes (comparisons using like or as) in your writing. Figurative language is rich in showing possibilities.

Ø      Make sure you’ve added color here and there, but don’t get stuck in the dull color rut. Remember the rich world of Crayola names (magenta, brick red, etc.) or make up colors of your own like “cloudless July sky blue.”

Ø      Set a mood in your writing and maintain it throughout. Decide what belongs from          

your prewriting and what distracts your reader. If you’re writing about a pleasant place, don’t throw in unpleasant ideas, for instance.

Ø      If you haven’t already done so, decide in your mind what time of day or night this is as well as what time of year and choose images to convey that to your reader.

Ø      When you write DON’T paragraph by the senses (a paragraph about sounds for instance would seem forced). Write naturally. Chronological order would work well for a flow. You might even begin by taking us into your forest, meadow, etc. and end by leaving the very place you’re writing about. HOWEVER, remember you are NOT telling a story. Spatial order would work nicely as well.

Ø      Show don’t tell. Stay away from these telling words if you can: smell, hear, taste, touch, feel, see, is, am, are, was, were, be, have, had, and use action words in their place.

                        Example of a bad telling sentence:

I saw trees above me and heard birds singing.

Example of a good showing sentence:

A morning dove cooed somewhere in the branches high above me.

Ø      Finally, make revisions in a different color pen or pencil than your original D1. Use that skipped line space to add ideas and move pieces around.